Wednesday, May 20, 2009

The point at which I stopped reading

Will Obama’s Exotic Excesses Bring Back the Boring White Guys?
America is dating a new, dashing man of the world. Sure, she knows he is driving his motorcycle way too fast, in the rain, at night. But still, it is really exciting and our girl has her arms tight around his waist and is squealing with delight at all the fun.
Columnist Bill Dupray doesn’t get very far -- just the second paragraph -- before stripping the gears on this metaphor.
Our girl knows her dad is not all that crazy about this new beau. The kid talks a great game and cleans up nice, but dad has this Eddie Haskell feeling about the guy.
Huh? If the smitten girl is America, then just who is America’s disapproving Daddy?

Bonus awfulness: Dupray actually refers to the dangerous boyfriend as “the young buck.”

4 comments:

Jim Wetzel said...

"If the smitten girl is America, then just who is America’s disapproving Daddy?"Why, that's easy. I do believe that one Mr. Bill Dupray has implicitly nominated himself for that slot.

"Who's your daddy, America? Who's your daddy?"

Jim Wetzel said...

Accursed Blogger™! There was supposed to be a little open space after the quote. And, in the preview, there was. Or, at least, that's my story, and I'm stickin' to it.

©∂†ß0X∑® said...

Daddy? That would be Thomas Jefferson, wouldn't it?

But then, he's neither approved nor disapproved of much of anything lately, being as how he's been dead a long time.

And given Jefferson's sexual proclivities, I don't think he'd have much room to disapprove in this case. He could always be a hypocrite and give it a try, though. He wouldn't be the first man in history to do that.

Randal Graves said...

The dad would have to be England, and by extension, the queen. But I'm currently eating a ham sandwich with colby jack and Grey Poupon, so what do I know.