Sunday, March 15, 2009

Beckheads of the world, unite!

Libby Spencer chronicles recent Beckhead activities over at The Impolitic. Apparently, thousands hundreds dozens of concerned citizens around the country joined together to intimidate the rest of us by pointing out they surround us, or something. In reality they only surrounded large-screen televisions featuring Glenn Beck’s performance art. They huddled together in places such as the Rex Theater in Wyoming, the Holiday Inn of Asheville, a Bassett Furniture showroom somewhere in Colorado, and the Magic Mighty Mushroom in Broward County (photo below).

Meanwhile Ace of Spades and his poker studs try really hard to imagine what a liberal wedding and reception must be like, in this case the upcoming nuptials of Jessica Valenti.

This is what commenter CTD envisions for the Valenti wedding reception.
No kegs. No open bar. No dancing.

Instead, the wedding party will perform the Vagina Monologues until all the victims guests have bled out through their ears.
Well I couldn’t let that go unanswered, could I?
CTD: And I've heard the groomsmen will be performing Penis Puppetry. Come to think of it, I'm going to try to wrangle an invitation to the reception.


Chris said...

Compared to the females of your species, you are a tiny little creature and it’s your task to somehow try and mate with her. Now, provided that you somehow managed to tap out the right tune on her web without being run through by her huge poisonous fangs, you need to attach yourself to her underbelly and deposit your gametes. But as you do, she’s chewing on you. That’s right. As a spider male, you’re your mate’s dinner and as she’s chomping on your lower half, you have to make sure you can finish the mating before she finally digests something vital.

Mo MoDo said...

Now I know where washed out dittoheads wind up. Frightening.

Mimi said...

Boy, am I confused. I had to Goggle Glen Beck to find out who he is. Oh, okay, just another wingnut hooked on publicity. It's the people who follow him I find fascinating. They seem so damn dumb, but are they? Or just hoodwinked? Dunno.

Anonymous said...

These left-right phony paradigm supporting blogs are just as stupid as anything they talk about by the default fact that they start out from such a false premise of viewing and understanding society. Sending out a message Beck = bogus is guaranteed to be by some total clueless moron that thinks Bush is the antichrist and Obama is some kind of savior. The reality is that they might as well both be the antichrist the way behave and the policies they enact. They're both war mongering freedom-hating fascists. Oops, sorry, I lost you all there so let me get back to your lingo: Bush bad! Obama good! Me angry! Sorry for the slip up in between there. Hopefully I got you back on track. ;)

Grace Nearing said...

The reality is that they might as well both be the antichrist the way behave and the policies they enact.

DDR: That's something I've never understood about antichristing different people. Is it possible to have more than one antichrist at the same time? Can the antichrist jump from person to person for strategic purposes? I'm serious. I remember when Bill Clinton was labeled the antichrist. What happened? And is it sexist that nobody seems to call a woman the antichrist?