Today I received the official 2007 Consumers’ Water Quality Report for Down-the-Jersey Shore. Asterisks abound. I polished my magnifying glass because we’re talking picocuries-per-liter and parts-per-million here. And then I read this:
The NJDEP found the following potential contaminant sources within the source assessment areas for our [water] sources: underground storage tanks, known contaminated sites, cemeteries….Suddenly I felt very woozy.
I drink dead people.