Tuesday, February 07, 2006


Mr. Nearing had a rare day off today, and actually got to watch our glorious cable newsters in full-tilt bug fuck mode.

Mr. N. is one of those beleaguered Americans whose work-plus-commute day is 13 to 14 hours long. Factoring in some sleep and some basic hygiene and grooming, his day is full. He doesn't get to follow the news, other than checking weather and traffic reports.

So when I found him getting agitated while watching a FOXNews "update," complete with file footage, of Islamic protests against the Muhammad cartoons, I warned him: As sure as you're watching TV, you're being manipulated.

Now, he got a bit huffy at this. I understand. But I couldn't resist, so I told him, absolutely guaranteed, that if the speeches at Coretta Scott King's funeral got to be a bit uncomfortable for the Bush administration, then someone would invoke the (alleged) overt politicization of the memorial for Paul Wellstone.

Less than 30 minutes later, my prediction came true. It was Chris Matthews, breaking in on MSNBC's live coverage of the service immediately after Bill and Hillary Clinton had given their speeches. He was reminded, Matthews said, of the Wellstone memorial.

Mr. N. looked at me in astonishment. Hey, it doesn't take a genius. These guys are so friggin' predictable.

Okay, now back to the cartoonacy.

Just google Muhammad + cartoons + conspiracy and you'll find that some people aren't accepting the current media narrative. Good for them. I like to pick my conspiracies very carefully, so I'm sitting out this one so far. Although I do wonder: How and why are people on all sides playing this the way they are? Who stands to benefit the most from keeping everybody riled up?

And for the lighter side of religious wars, we turn to VodkaPundit, who bravely typed out this threat to Muslims offended and rioting over the Muhammad cartoons: "They want a culture war? Fine. Let's give them one."

To which I responded: "Well, then, fine. Print up the cartoons on some T-shirts, travel to the Muslim countries of your choice, and have yourself filmed wearing them. Put me down for five sets of the VodkaPundit Memorial DVDs."

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